Carahil

FP

Adonis Rep

Some time ago, I had the privelage of interviewing the good Captain Davage, aboard his straylight starship the Seeker. You can read the May 2nd entry and catch up on my adventures aboard the rented P.U.F.F.Y., but it was through my continued acquaintance with the good Captain, that I was introduced to my latest interview: Carahil.

Carahil began life as a SilverTech familiar of The Lady Poe, but has since distinguished himself to the point of intergalactic fame, and a standing invitation to the revered Celestial Arborium. Even without the recent acclaim, I've long desired to sit the whiskery little trouble maker down to interview. His uniquely positive outlook on life, and our mutual love for general mischief make him an ideal catch for my readers.
In fact, I owe that slippery little rascal for my most recent embarrassment suffered at his hands. (I should say flippers, as Carahil most often masquarades as a silver seal).
A month ago I received an invitation to Blanchefort Castle, the luxurious Kana home of Captain Davage, and his beautiful wife, Lady Sygillis.
To the esteemed Adonis Rep, it said, from an admirer and avid reader. I should have seen through the ruse right then and there.
Please do us the courtesy of joining us at Castle Blanchefort for the bowling match of the season!
I love bowling. This was not to be missed.
The Lady Sygillis is hosting a naked bowling tournament, and you are invited. Shoes are recommended, but not required, but NO CLOTHES ARE ALLOWED. Of course you may want to bring your own balls, as Lord Davage tends to be very particular about who can touch his.
This was it! I was finally an esteemed member of League society. Lady Sygillis' naked bowling tournaments were legend, and to finally be invited. . .
Alas, when I showed up, a certain coniving silver seal had his laugh.
It wasn't a naked bowling match that I showed up to, but a formal ball the Lady Sygillis was throwing in honor of the newly elligeble Lady Poe. I arrived in my brand new bowling shoes and nothing else. Everyone, from the loftiest Vith noble, to the most decorated Fleet Admiral, got to see me in all my glory that night.
The merciful Lady Poe was kind enough to fashion me a robe of Silver Tech for the evening, but Carahil had won the day.
I owe that slippery seal. I owe him big time.
With devious thoughts swirling through my mind, I prepped for the interview, then used my Ring of Portation to travel instantaneously to the Lady Poe's appartments within Castle Blanchefort, where Carahil agreed to meet me.
My gregarious silver host was there waiting for me, and indicated a seat for me to occupy. I gratefully sat, and immediately jumped back up.

Adonis Rep: Oh my! What? Was that a kitten?

I'd sat on something soft and warm, that promptly took a nip at my backside.

Carahil: Nah, that wasn't a kitten. I think it was my lunch. Go ahead and keep it warm for me, I'll finish it up later.

Well, lunch or no lunch, whatever it was wandered off, so I carefully checked my seat for further strays and settled in.

AR: Great to see you again, Carahil. It's been . . . what? months? I can't recall the circumstances at the moment. Some sort of gala at Castle Blanchefort, no doubt.

C: Oh, I love galas. The noise, the excitement. So many faces just crying out for pie. I love pie too ... You like pie? Sure you do.

AR: I'm afraid to answer that question. Mentioning pies in your company seems to draw unwanted attention. I do recall being the center of attention for that evening, however. You seem to be at the center of things lately, though. Rumor has you up to your neck in Black Hats at the moment. Care to comment?

C: Oh, I love Black Hats, too. Look what you get. You get: a beautiful lady who'll love you `til the day she drops dead. It's just that awkward 'first date' you have to worry about.

AR: Awkward, indeed. Several 'first dates' have proved fatal of late. Speaking of fatal . . . is it true you spent some time near The Hazards of the Old Ones? I thought those things were sealed off? No pun intended.

C: Ya, like I've not heard that one before. I did, visit the Hazards recently and it was horrible. Not a bathroom in sight and just try finding a good bistro serving Bazz food out there. You can't. You'll be eating stuff out of a brown bag if you go out there. Trust me, you good people out there don't want to go to the Hazards. Lots of animal poop, too.

AR: Any insight on the recent desertion of the highly decorated Lt. Kilos? I understand she went to the Hazards with you?

C: I . . . have no recollection of that. Lt. Kilos accomplished the coveted 'roommate swap' recently, going from the Stellar Marines, to the Fleet without missing a beat. Good Lady.

AR: Fancy that. A seal playing coy. Some might see your involvement in recent events as manipulative. Tell me about the Frustration of the gods, and how that effects your decisions and motives.

C: Oh, it's frustrating being a god. Imagine--I could kick some major tail if I wanted, and I want to sometimes but, I'm not allowed to do so. Go figure! Heck, take now, for example. I could turn you into a fly and pull your wings out, and then fix you right up again. Don't worry--I'm not going to turn you into a fly. I thought about it, but I'm not going to do it.

AR: Well, I suppose that's a relief. Transmutation is not really something I'm fond of.

At this point in the conversation Carahil produces a small box.

C: By the way, smell this. Go on--smell it.

AR: This feels like a set up. I should warn you, Carahil, all pranks will be answered in full. But, I'm feeling brave today. Whatever is in that box, it can't possibly be less appetizing than your lunch that I sat on. Pass it here. I'll give it a sniff.

C: Famous last words.

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Check out The League of Elder: The Hazards of the Old Ones, and other books by Ren Garcia at www.theleagueofelder.com
You can also purchase his books on Amazon



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Keep an eye out for his soon to be released new trilogy: The Temple of the Exploding Head. The first book: The Dead Held Hands, should be out in March, 2011
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Adonis Rep interviews are created and written by Tim Worsham. If you are an author or fan of genre fiction and would like to see one of your favorite characters interviewed, contact Tim at tcworm@hotmail.com